Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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