ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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