so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
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If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
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