Pregnant stripper...not hot.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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