You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
how drunk are you?
Several
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize