worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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