I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
