dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize