I got chris browned last night
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
The police scanner is talking about you again....
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
