cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
