My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
