They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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