Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
