Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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