you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
