I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Farmville is her only friend.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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