Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
two words: eviction party
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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