Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
