YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Randomize
