Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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