So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
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