Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
be right there i have to get my cape
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Randomize
