I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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