You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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