Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Even my vagina gasped.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
