i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
