Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
My balls are so social today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish my penis had a tongue
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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