Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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