So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
