I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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