They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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