I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
