just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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