I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize