ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
