Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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