I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize