for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Welp...herpes.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize