He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
