I think my fart just growled at me.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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