I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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