That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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