Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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