There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
