Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize
