Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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