i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
