Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
No subtext here. People are naked.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize