I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
