Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
