I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
