Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I just forgot I was standing up.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
