I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
