Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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